I've been away...

...to the Tilly Whim Caves indeed! But I've crept back out again, into the sunlight, guided by the lighthouse...

In truth I've been away due to a li'l 'crisis of creativity' as I'm calling it. After opening the Ectopic Heartbeats etsy shop I felt inexplicably despondent for a long time. I lost all passion for anything I created; felt like it was all a waste of time, and I hated it. I hadn't embroidered anything for a long time, and I didn't want to. I couldn't write - not stories anyway. So I did nothing but read books and write in my scrapbook/journal...and I wrote heaps. And for a while that was the only thing I took joy from. 

And then I had a holiday, so Dan and I went to the Purbecks, and stayed in a gorgeous old Victorian hotel for a night in Swanage, and explored this place that we love. We love it so much we've decided this is where we want to build a nest. 

It's far away enough to achieve the escapism I've desired for a long time, but close enough to Bournemouth to be near my family.

We even went to view a flat above the estate agents we were peering at! The flat was perfect - two double bedrooms with views of Swanage bay and the steam train station on the other side through the cool li'l kitchen with retro appliances...I wanted it so bad!

Alas, there's no way we can afford it now. But I've decided to move back home temporarily to save a bundle, so that in a few years we can afford to buy a flat similar in the town, ideally above a shop with sea views. It means putting on hold the wedding plans for a bit longer, but the change in my destiny has given me so much hope that I am chirpier, more creative and less stressed. 

I am a happy bunny ;)

And Swanage has the best craft shop! Way smaller than Hobbycraft, but I love their fat quarters. And a cute little health food shop that oddly seems to fit all the foods I love plus fresh veg and organic eggs. 

Open country, small indie shops including a string of charity shops that could rival Boscombe, a few pubs with real ale, and the sea. All within a few miles.

Yes, I adore this place.

Maybe I breathe better now because I know where my home is...

Best of all I'm crafting again! But for now I'm doing things for myself and loved ones only. I'll leave the shop where it is, but I'm not concentrating on it. I've started making that quilt I've been wanting to do for an age, though I haven't got much further than cutting fabric and sewing a few squares together.

It's inspired by the Grimm Fairytales that I've been reading a lot lately. See, I've discovered a pattern to most of these stories...children or vulnerable girls are thrown out by wicked relatives or conspiring witches and are forced to seek shelter and nourishment from the forest! So I wrote this verse that I'm going to embroider onto the quilt as I sew it all together...

I was cast out and 

I turned to the forest

where I slept in 

a hollow tree.

I made this quilt

from fallen hair

and autumn leaves

and poetry.

Myself and Katie and our lovely friend Clair Bear went to see two amazing bands during my week off: Sylver Tongue and Bat For Lashes. They were both outstanding...

Charlotte Hadley wore this animal pelt capelet that was stunning and made her look like a tribal huntress (though I'm naively hoping it was faux and friendly...) and whose music in my mind drew parallels with Goldfrapp and Amanda Palmer esp Creatures, my favourite...

...and Natasha Khan...

...well...

*sigh*

She is just Divinity Incarnate! 

Bat For Lashes is mesmerising to watch. She commands the stage and dances with charm and ritualistic fervour, and then her ambient songs bring tears to our eyes, which are so pure and tangible after her music that they turn to pearls on our cheeks, and we keep them in our pockets and remember how she pounded upon the drum machine during Lilies and the beat went straight through our hearts and near ruptured mine.

x Nina x